With age, many face the ultimate parenting peril: to leave a legacy or live out their dreams. From mapping out the ideal retirement to securing your children’s futures, here’s what an online community says about leaving behind an inheritance rather than spending on yourself.
Table of Contents
1. A Lack Of Heirlooms and Memories
A member shares how their dad wanted to build a woodworking shop for himself during retirement to move his hobby out of the garage and thoroughly enjoy it. However, he didn’t want to spend the inheritance, so he never did it.
“We wanted him to enjoy his earnings, not save it for us. Now he’s passed on; we have no heirlooms or memories, but we have a bit of extra cash. Not a good deal at all,” shared the commenter.
2. Embracing the Outcome
Many recommend parents to live the life that they want to live. “If there is some money left, great. If no money is left at the end, great,” comments one member. Either way, what matters is you live the life you want.
3. Life’s Too Short For Savings
One commenter’s grandparent wanted to go on a European trip with their three last living siblings but was told that doing so would deprive their great-grandchildren of their inheritance.
“You could see the heartbreak of missing out on this, watching their siblings enjoy this adventure,” said the commenter. As if this wasn’t bad enough, the pandemic came, and their grandparent passed away.
4. The Ultimate Gift
While it wouldn’t be wrong to not leave an inheritance for your children, “it would be ‘wrong’ if you didn’t raise them to be able to support themselves,” says one user. A member notes that much of inherited wealth is frittered away after two to three generations in the United States.
In that case, “the skills, history, connections, and life experience you pass on to your kids are far more valuable than money,” they shared.
5. You Owe Nothing
“Nope… you don’t owe your kids an inheritance if you don’t want to,” said one person. Numerous members echo this sentiment.
One points out that you only owe your kids not being a burden on them. “Take care of yourself and don’t leave them with any debt (including funeral expenses),” they said.
6. Now Or Never
One person shared an exception to the rule, stating, “If the money would help your children now, and you want to do that, then give it to them now.”
A member shares that if your children require assistance with food stamps, student loans, credit card debt for bills, etc., help them now, not later. “Be alive to see them prosper,” they wrote.
7. Voluntary Assistance
While the children are adults and should make their way, a member notes that it is getting harder and harder every year to get an education, buy a house, and save money.
If you genuinely want to do something nice for them, you can. It’s your call!
8. It’s the Thought That Counts
According to one commenter, tell your children about your intentions and see how they react. “If your kids love you, they should want you to enjoy life (even/especially) by spending their inheritance,” they stated.
However, your decision changes slightly based on how well your kids are doing. “If they are fine and you are fine, enjoy your money first (wisely), and leave what you can’t spend,” someone else wrote.
9. Spending Wisely
As long as you’re not “blowing money” on things such as gambling, MLMs, and other scams, a user believes there is nothing wrong with not leaving an inheritance. If the money can be spent to bring you greater joy and ease, do it!
“You being happy should bring joy to those that actually love you,” they wrote.
10. A Personal Choice
Lastly, your money is your own. It’s up to you what you consider a good way to use your money, depending on your goals.
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This thread inspired this post.
I’m John Schmoll, a former stockbroker, MBA-grad, published finance writer, and founder of Frugal Rules.
As a veteran of the financial services industry, I’ve worked as a mutual fund administrator, banker, and stockbroker and was Series 7 and 63-licensed, but I left all that behind in 2012 to help people learn how to manage their money.
My goal is to help you gain the knowledge you need to become financially independent with personally-tested financial tools and money-saving solutions.
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